So sorry I’ve been away. I wish I could say I’ve had some wondrous adventure, that I was finishing up a manuscript or adhering to a rough and unyielding tour schedule. The reason for my prolonged absence is nothing spectacular. It is simply this, I’ve been too dizzy to blog. That being said I have prepared something exciting for all of you who fell in love with For Always, especially those of you who are team Jordan! So here it is, back in school right after the smokey bus incident from Jordan’s POV.
For Always Ch-4 Jordan’s POV
My heart raced like the Road Runner trying to escape Wile E Coyote. I can’t believe I over-reacted like that. I couldn’t handle the thought of being trapped. For a minute I was four years old lying on the attic floor, banging on the door for someone to help me. Not this time. I couldn’t let myself be trapped, not with an exit in my reach right next to me. But I shouldn’t have bailed on her. I should’ve told Stephanie what to do once I reached the ground. Shit, now everyone will be talking about it. I had to take a deep breath and focus on the spin.
“But how did you know what to do? Have you ever done that before?” Stephanie beamed at me with excitement.
“Read the signs,” I answered doing my best to act like nothing out of the ordinary just happened. “It clearly says emergency exit above the window. How else do you think you would get out?”
“I think you could use the doors.”
She nodded. “Still, it seems so drastic. I mean to kick it out like that.”
I shook my head, “Nothing happened to the window. You know that right? The window isn’t broken.”
“I’m not an idiot, you know.”
I laughed. No, of course she wasn’t an idiot, but teasing her was fun and made me forget for a minute what a fool I made out of myself.
As we entered the front doors of the school, Stephanie changed. Her eyes didn’t look as bright and happy as they did a second ago. She looked sad and unsure of herself. I wondered why? How could I get her to smile again? She was so pretty when she smiled, and when it was real, no girl could hold a candle to Stephanie.
I started to shift direction toward my locker. She looked down at her feet. What happened to cause this change in her mood? Was it me, was she embarrassed to be seen with me after what I’d just done? What was going through her mind? And why didn’t I want to let her go? She seemed so relaxed, so at ease with herself today. I’d never seen her like that before. She always came across so insecure and guarded. Was it because she was alone? Did Maria intimidate her that much?
“See you,” she held up her hand and waved.
“That’s it?” I couldn’t believe she was just going to walk away. I wasn’t ready to let her go. I wanted to keep her close. “After we share a tragic, life altering event?” I thought if I continued walking in the direction of my locker she’d follow. One step, nothing. Two steps, bingo! Stephanie scurried alongside me trying to keep up. “You’re going to walk away, like this is just a regular day?”
“Life altering event?” She laughed. I never heard her laugh before. Not like this. It sounded real, completely unforced. Not that phony flirtatious laugh girls always put on.
“You mean when you so rudely pushed me aside to save yourself?”
Oh good, Stephanie’s playful mood returned. “I only did it to pave the way for an escape for you.”
“You are so full of it.”
She leaned against the locker next to mine. I felt her eyes on me as I tossed my jacket inside. This I was used to. I often noticed Stephanie staring at me as Maria would drone on incessantly. I liked having her full attention.
“And you love every minute of it,” I couldn’t keep the smile off my face. Something about the way she reacted to me today, I could tell she wanted me, and that gave me a warm gushy feeling inside.
Stephanie looked up at me through her eyelashes. Her eyes seemed to say, “take me, I’m yours.” I held her stare not wanting to release her as I took a step closer. The pull I felt for her, the longing I saw in her eyes made me feel strong, powerful, a stark comparison to how frightened and weak I felt fifteen minutes earlier. At that moment I wanted her. In every way. I wanted her mind, body and soul.
I placed my hands on either side of her, resting them on the locker where she stood. Her hair covered part of the left side of her face. I wanted to see every nook and cranny of her face. I wanted to see the crinkle in Stephanie’s nose when she smiled, along with each blush I hoped to cause in her creamy skin. I brushed the hair back behind her ear. I heard her inhale as my fingers brushed over her skin.
I fought to keep my breath steady. I didn’t want her to know I was just as undone as she. I didn’t want to give her any hint of the thoughts running my mind. I wanted to throw her over my shoulder and whisk her off somewhere private. I wanted to press my body against hers and explore her pouty, pink lips. All I could focus on was how much I wanted to kiss her. I felt my muscles tighten as all out need roared through my veins.
The loud metal clanking of the locker next to us being slammed startled me. I snapped my head to the right to see what idiot just interrupted us. And then I realized what I was doing, what I would’ve done. No. I couldn’t. Stephanie was just too young, too vulnerable. I couldn’t hurt her, not like that. I let my arms fall to my sides. Without a word, I stepped back and turned toward the hall we had just come from.
“c’mon,” I looked back to find she hadn’t moved. She looked confused, let down. I hated that I could do that to her. Distance would help. I needed to distance myself from her today, tomorrow. It hurt even to think about it.
“Where are we going?” She asked hope once again alive in her eyes. I had to be careful with Stephanie, very, very careful.
I sniggered as I watched pink color fill her cheeks, certain I knew where her head was, somewhere in the gutter right next to mine.
“To your locker,” I answered as the bell rang. Saved by the bell, thank goodness. I let out a long frustrated breath and put my hand out for her to go first. “Lead the way.”
So what do you think? Did you like it? Want more xtra’s from Jordan’s POV? If you want to see more, you have to let me know! How? It’s simple, Just leave a comment telling me what you thought of this, and other scenes you might like to see from Jordan’s POV!